1st Day of Radiation

We had an absolutely wonderful Easter on Sunday.  I'll post some pictures when I get a minute to get them out of my camera.  Sunday night, Nate and I headed to the airport to catch our 8pm flight to Houston.  With the time difference, we got in at 12:30am, but Nate didn't sleep a wink on the plane.  Some kind gentlemen helped me get all of our stuff from baggage claim to the rental car shuttles and Nate promptly fell asleep in the stroller while I was signing the rental agreement.  By the time we picked up the car and got to Stephanie's, I didn't lay down until after 2am.  Radiation is bright and early at 7am, so I got up at 5am to make sure I knew where we were going and we wouldn't be late.  Everything is a well oiled machine at the proton center.  We check in, go down stairs and see the nurse for vitals, then Nate gets to play in the play room until they come get him for his treatment.  Softie got his radiation treatment first...administered by Dr. Nater.  We headed back to the proton machine which Nate calls "the Star Wars machine" (he calls all scan machines "Star Wars machines" too).  The machine is pretty intimidating...much, much larger than a CT scanner.  When he saw the machine, he said, "No!  I want the smaller Star Wars machine.", referring to the CT scanner.  The child life specialist was there to help me distract him, though, and he quickly forgot about his fear.



I sat on the end of the long table with him in my lap.  They hooked up his line to an IV pump and let Nate push the buttons to start his anesthesia.  The white medicine makes it up the tubes and through his line...he half screamed, then got completely limp in my arms.  The nurses and technicians helped me do the "proton dance" as I carried his limp body to the positioner at the other end of the table.  Softie and I gave him a quick kiss and went to wait in the waiting room.  I managed to only shed a few, silent tears.  The actual radiation treatment probably took about a half an hour.  They gave me a pager, like at a restaurant, that goes off when I can go back to recovery to see him.  For some reason, my pager didn't go off this morning and they came out looking for me.  When I got back to him, he was P-I-S-S-E-D.  I don't know if he would have been better if I got there a little earlier.  We will see how tomorrow goes.  He just didn't want anything.  He cried for Stephanie (who was at work), he cried for Stephanie's car, he wanted to go home (to Phoenix), he was just mad.  He fell asleep in the car on the way back to Steph's and after a little bit, it was like a switch turned on and he was happy and wanted an ice cream sandwich.  He's doing awesome!  No side effects, that I can tell, at all yet.  He ate well all day and was full of energy.  He was running around, tiring me out and being a total stinker.  I couldn't ask for anything more.  He is such a loving, sweet, funny boy.  I'm taking this time to soak up everything that is 3 year old Nate.  I pray that he continues to do so well, through this treatment.  One down, eleven to go.

While I am enjoying every, single moment with my sweet boy...my heart is heavy.  There are so many children and families suffering right now in our cancer and specifically, Neuroblastoma, community.  I don't know what is going on, but every time I turn around there is another child that is relapsed, progressing or suffering complications of treatment.  Neuroblastoma is a nasty, nasty disease.  Please take a moment and say a prayer for all the warriors and their families who are suffering so badly right now.  Brennan, Jake, Ila Jean, Emily, Ethan, Brooke, Codey, Jack and countless others that I don't even know about.  Please pray for all the children that are fighting through treatment and are doing so well (like Nate).    I pray for miracles.  I pray for peace and comfort for the children and their families.  I pray that those who are doing so well, will continue, and will beat this nasty disease forever.  Amen.